Within the Other's mind

I'm afraid to peek behind the curtain,
I won't find God, of that I'm certain.
I won't find what is kind and gentle
Neither would there be a lying heaven.
I will have no land to stand upon
And no clean river to drink from.
But I know my wings will be clipped
And I'd be lowered further; into a dark pit.
So is it too bad, the contract I have?
It allows me, at least a thousand free hands.
I am thus, too afraid to break the deal
For even in God, I might see the Devil.